Head, Heart, Gut: The Game
An embodied practice to get unstuck on a decision.
Last night we hosted a couple at our new flat in Lisbon. Conversation traversed broad topics from Portuguese history, to office vs homeworking, to the no sugar diet one guest was trying.
I also shared some insights about what somatic coaching is and building embodied self-awareness, and this piqued the couples interest. It reminded them of a game they do together.
Head, Heart, Gut: The Game
A brilliant shortcut to ‘get out the mind, and into the body’ on a decision you are trying to make.
The couple (Kat and Callum) explained that they were struggling to decide about some upcoming travel they had planned. The trips were important for different reasons but something felt sticky for Kat. Why couldn’t she decide? To go or not to go, that is the question!
“Let’s head, heart, gut it,” Callum, suggested.
He explained they usually sit on the floor, cross legged, opposite each other. Away from screens. Focussing on each other and their bodies.
Then they ask the head, “what do you want to do?”
Let the mind blabber about all the conceptual options and pros and cons. Financial constraints, what other people will think, the unknowns of how you (or your body) will feel in the future, work commitments. Blah blah blah.
Just give the head its moment to flood and flush the incessant spiralling thoughts. Those that have kept you stuck in the decision up until this point.
Thank you head, you’ve had the mic, now shove over.
Over to the heart
Deep breath. Picture, if you can, the area around your heart and the organ itself beating. Rhythmically pumping inside your chest. The power and energy of your very life source. Imagine it there functioning continuously, independently, automatically. Feel it expanding and contracting in your chest.
Sense into this area of your body and then ask the question, “what do you want to do?”
Just sit there, with eyes closed if that helps, and listen. What sensations do you feel around your heart? If it could speak, what would it say? Do any words or images come to mind? Say them out loud. Go with it. Whatever might arise. No judgment or editing allowed.
You might be embarrassed, shy, surprised, humoured by whatever arises. This emotions are useful! There’s your truth of what you desire.
There’s an interesting connection between emotions and the heart. And it’s based in more than a spiritual or woo-like ‘knowing’. There’s a physiological explanation…
As we know, emotions can have a physical affect on the heart. Stress or happiness can influence heart rate and blood pressure. There’s a field of study known as psychocardiology, which explores this interaction between the mind and the heart.
The vagus nerve, which runs from the brain to the abdomen, plays a significant role in this mind-heart connection. It helps regulate heart rate and is also involved in our emotional and psychological responses. When people say “I’m listening to my heart,” it’s often them saying they are tuning into their emotional or intuitive responses. These are actually brain functions but can have physical manifestations in the heart area, like changes in heart rate or a feeling of warmth.
So, while the heart itself is not a source of truth or decision-making in a scientific sense, the way our bodies respond to emotions can make it feel as though our heart is guiding us.
Thank you heart. (It’s actually a really nice embodied practice to send some gratitude its way. Try it out!)
Let’s check in with your gut
Come back into your body, and focus your attention around the stomach area. Notice any sensations that are there, some rumbles maybe, some softness or tension possibly. Without needing to change anything just rest your attention on your gut.
And ask it, “what do you want to do?”
This is usually the instinctive, get up and go response. It can be a bit of a ‘f*** it, let’s try this option’ reply. You might sense something like a finger poking you from the inside out. Or like a disc inside is flattening. You could have a feeling of emptiness. Follow whatever is there. Let words or images bubble up. See where it leads.
Practicing finding these sensation words is an excellent way to move towards better embodied self-awareness. Becoming more attuned on a granular level to what’s going on inside.
This has a more biological basis than you might think. The gut is referred to as the “second brain.” …
This “second brain” is known as the enteric nervous system (ENS) and is located in the walls of the gastrointestinal (GI) tract. The ENS contains approximately 500 million neurons (the human brain contains about 100 billion neurons).
The ENS operates independently but also communicates with the central nervous system, including the brain. The ENS sends signals to the brain that can affect your mood, often without us being conscious of it. This connection is part of the reason why our emotions can sometimes affect our digestive system (like when you feel sick when you’re nervous).
Recent research has shown that the gut microbiome (the bacteria living in our GI tract) can also influence our brains, potentially affecting our decision-making processes.
This gut-brain connection explains that “gut instinct” or “gut feeling” you call on when deciding something. It’s sending your brain a message, ‘be careful,’ or ‘yes I want that!’.
So, where does that leave you?
With more options!
You began with a conceptual loop tape in your mind. Possibly limited to one or two polar opposite routes. An A or a B. Neither of which felt attractive.
Now you have head-heart-gut-stormed (see what I did there) some alternatives. Most importantly you have felt into them. Bringing awareness to the full spectrum of what is really at play, and what really might be keeping you stuck.
You’ve revealed those secret whisperings of your subconscious, allowing a voice to some more vulnerable concerns. Now you can really weigh up which of the routes seems to be the best to take. Balancing your desire, your fears, your concerns and the more practical logistics.
Instead of keeping stuck in the mind, you invited the whole of your bodymind into the conversation.
It’s important to bring awareness to the signals of our body, as around 80% of the nervous system’s activity is gathering information ‘bottom-up’ from the body to the brain…
Did you know, we have two types of nerves in the body… Afferent nerves are the ‘bottom-up’ pathways (sensory information going to the brain), and efferent nerves are the ‘top-down’ pathways (motor commands going from the brain to muscles or glands).
A significant part of the nervous system’s activity is devoted to gathering and processing sensory information from the body and the external environment.
Your bottom-up afferent signals include the five ‘external’ senses (sight, hearing, taste, smell, touch) and the more subtle cues from the internal body (which is called interoception) and proprioception (the sense of your body’s position, posture and movement in its surroundings).
“Listening” to our bodies is crucial for good physical health, as our body often sends early warning signs of illness or discomfort, as well as emotional and psychological well-being, as bodily sensations are closely tied to emotional experiences.
Where did Kat and Callum land? It unearthed some gut intuition that the travel might be a bit too much for a soon-to-be heavily pregnant Kat. She was able to voice her nervousness around what her body might be able to cope with. It wasn’t just the pressure of fitting in family trips this year or a FOMO. This new awareness brought some more serious considerations to the table that helped them navigate a decision. It also allowed them to be more compassionate to the changing needs of their circumstances. Travelling while pregnant is unfamiliar territory and needed some acknowledgment.
Have a go!
Next time you’re stuck on making a decision, lying awake at night, letting the mind whir away… have a go at Head, Heart, Gut.
I’d love to hear about what your full bodymind told you.
I am a Somatic Coach and through my writing attempt to capture the human experience, through our minds and bodies. If you’re interested in what Somatic Coaching is or would like to try it, find out more about it here.
Thanking writing buddies Benjamin Gordon Sniffen, Rebecca Isjwara and Mohammad for their feedback!